In honour of Mother's Day, I wanted to share another story of motherhood. I know that through sharing experiences, we can make this thing called motherhood feel less lonely and find connections through struggles and joys.
*Trigger Alert* - this story includes topics of infertility, miscarriage, postpartum birth complications. Proceed with caution if this is a sensitive topic for you.
Meet Sara-Lynn. She's a twin mom to two boys, works as a Supervisor of a team that focuses on Family Mental Health and Social Inclusion and has graciously shared her story about her journey of becoming a mom.
This is her story.
"My hubby and I were diagnosed with unexplained infertility, and ended up spending 7 years trying to get pregnant. In 2012, on our first round of IUI - or intrauterine insemination - we did get pregnant, but then had an early (6 week) miscarriage. In 2013, we had a successful IUI again, and found out I was carrying twins (it was such a joyful day!). We knew from the get-go that twins could be a high risk pregnancy. I had some spotting early into the pregnancy, but they attributed it to placenta previa. I was put on bedrest at home at 24 weeks, after a bit more bleeding, and monitored more closely."
Placenta previa occurs when a baby's placenta partially or totally covers the mother's cervix — the outlet for the uterus. Placenta previa can cause severe bleeding during pregnancy and delivery. Placenta previa can resolve during the course of a pregnancy as the uterus grows and the distance between the placenta and the cervix increases. In instances that it does not change, a cesarean is required so the placenta is not ruptured during labour and delivery.
"At 28 weeks, I went for a routine ultrasound, and the doctor immediately admitted me to the hospital because my cervix had shortened too much, and I was at risk of pre-term labour. I don't know if it was coincidence or what...but the next day I DID start going into labour. They were able to stop the contractions, and I remained in the hospital from that point on."
It is normal for the cervix to shorten during the late stages of pregnancy to allow the baby to be birthed, but if it begins to happen too soon the risk of premature birth increases. It is greatest when the cervix is less than 25 millimeters long.
"I stayed in the hospital for 7 more weeks (longest days of my life....), but my babies were healthy and growing, and it was all
worth it for them."
"At the time, we were living on Vancouver Island (an island off the coast of British Columbia, Canada), and the community we were in did not have a NICU, so we were in a hospital in Victoria (the province's capital), which was 3 hours away from home. I stayed in the hospital for 7 more weeks (longest days of my life....), but my babies were healthy and growing, and it was all worth it for them. I continued to bleed throughout the time, but did not have any other labour scares.
At 35 weeks, I started leaking amniotic fluid and they were worried that Baby A did not have enough fluid, so they decided to induce me. Funnily, the hospital on that day did not have capacity in their NICU, so I was sent to a different hospital, that ended up being only 1 hour away from home. I was induced, and had an epidural, and laboured for 8-9 hours (but I couldn't walk around, which was no good) until they brought me to the OR to deliver because there was a high chance I would need an emergency c-section so I had to give birth there, just in case.
Baby A was born, weighing 4lb,12oz...healthy but just small. He was taken to the NICU to be settled. You would think that Baby B would be shortly behind him...but he was NOT. It was another 2 1/2 hours of pushing until Baby B made his appearance! He wasn't in any distress, so the doctors decided to let him come on his own time.
I guess I am glad he was not forced out but I really thought I would die during that time, lol. He was born weighing 5lb9oz. He joined his brother in the NICU, and after it was all done, I literally passed out for 4 hours. I was so frail and exhausted.
The twins were healthy - just premature - so they just needed routine monitoring in the NIUC. They couldn't eat at first and were fed through their noses. They had jaundice, and typical preemie stuff, but no major complications. They ended up only needing 3 weeks in the NICU (while we stayed at a hotel as close to the hospital as we could)."
"I don't think I received enough proper after care, as I continued to bleed after the birth."
"As for me, however, I don't think I received enough proper after care, as I continued to bleed after the birth. I even went to emergency one night as a walk-in, and they found I had retrained some placenta. I was given misoprostol - which is a medication that causes a miscarriage - in hopes to expel everything. They checked with ultrasound after, and thought it was all good.
But a few days later, I was out (with my husband and two of his male friends who came to visit) for dinner, and I started hemmoraging. I didn't know what was happening, but decided I had better call 9-1-1. Thankfully we did, because I had lost so much blood. I didn't pass out (though nearly did). I ended up needing 2 blood transfusions, after an emergency D&C (not until after the doctor in emergency thought she could put her hand INSIDE me and pull out what was retained of the placenta....WORST experience of my LIFE!!!). Anyways, lol....I was again very weak and frail after that, but finally the bleeding stopped."
Retained placenta is when the placenta is not delivered within 30 minutes of the baby’s birth. It is a serious problem as it can lead to severe infection or life-threatening blood loss. Risk factors of retained placenta include being over the age of 30, having a premature baby or if your first and second stages of labour were very long. It can also happen if you have a fibroid or another problem with your uterus.
"We came home 3 weeks later with our little boys, and seriously, they were (and are) so amazing. The first 3-6 months are completely a blur! I didn't know it at the time, but I definitely had postpartum anxiety like crazy - even as a counsellor, I didn't know that was a thing! It was the most insane time of my life, but so, so precious when I look back too. I was able to breastfeed them both (with some issues along the way) until they were almost 2. They grew steadily, and had no developmental issues. I met some awesome other twin mamas (there were 3 sets of boy twins born within 1 month of each other in our small community - how random is that?). And...we all survived. That is the biggest feat. And now they are 8! They were the sweetest, cutest babies you could imagine...and are the most incredible little boys ever now. Their names are Rivers Josiah, and Micah Jude, by the way.
I am so so blessed to be their mama, and love our story!" I LOVE Sara-Lynn's story of strength, overcoming the odds of infertility and the complications that can arise from a high-risk twin pregnancy. There were a lot of things thrown her way, but she listened to the needs of her body throughout pregnancy and into her postpartum recovery, advocating for herself when she didn't think she was recovering the way she was supposed to.
Happy (Belated) Mother's Day to mamas of all walks of life. I hope you were celebrated and showered with love because YOU matter.